Relationships – Page 21 – Jewish Relationships Initiative

Death to Natalie Portman?!?

In reaction to Ms. Portman’s decision to reject the Genesis Prize the Jewish world has been a blaze. She has been vilified and pilloried. It seems just a matter of time before someone calls for her head. Ms. Portman was initially vague in her reasons for her action except to say that she did not want to appear to support Netanyahu or policies with which she has serious objections. As a citizen of Israel, a democratic country, she has the right to express her opinions regardless of who may agree.

Israel is ostensibly a Democracy and Ms. Portman is an Israeli citizen. So she is arguably demonstrating a loyalty to her country by exercising her right to an opinion and speaking out. Whether you agree or disagree with her position, her rights as a citizen should be respected and so should she. Ms. Portman is an accomplished, intelligent person.

As such, her opinions are likely thoughtful and deliberate, all the more so given the ramifications of this public stand.

The personal attacks on her and calls for charges of treason and revocation of her Israeli Citizenship are at best extreme and unwarranted. Whether you agree with her position, one can respectfully and even vehemently disagree without resorting to the calumny bandied about. The fact that she is an Israeli citizen and an active supporter of her homeland gives her voice a particular gravitas, something she undoubtedly considered in her decision and public statements. It is inappropriate and shameful that so many rush to judgement, seeking her head.

Our community needs to do better. We argue and disagree all the time. That is part of Jewish and Israeli cultural DNA. But if we forget that we are Am Yisrael we do so at our own peril. Anti-Semitism is alive and well. Those seeking a world without Jews or Israel are plentiful. It would be tragic if we did their work for them through the baseless hatred or Sinat Chinam, our tradition warns us against.

Natalie Portman was awarded the Genesis Prize, the highest achievement of her country Israel. She has decided to take a stand and reject this award. To spurn this national recognition is not done cavalierly, but with forethought. This was not some grade-school essay competition. The Prize signals a deep respect for her and her extraordinary achievements. We might do well to remember that before labeling her with disdain and contempt. Perhaps we might learn from the stand that she has taken and learn something about her, our people, and ourselves.

Passover and Legacy

As we share Passover at the Seder table this year, notice that it is in the process of change. We are instructed to remember the Exodus experience and to consider as though we experience it ourselves as we participate in the reenactment. But this tradition evolves; with each generation, we fashion the Seder into something that is uniquely ours.

I recall the Seders of two generations ago, the seemingly endless table that ran from room to room of the small apartment in the Bronx or the small home in Queens. These are wonderful memories from long ago and much of those traditions continue on. But our current Seder will be different from those of my past. For example, an Orange and Olives will find themselves on our current Seder Plate and Miriam’s cup will be prominently placed alongside Elijah’s. Instead of asking the four questions, I will lead (to the extent my boisterous family will permit). We will read from a Hagaddah fashioned by my niece with interpretations and questions that resonate with her generation. For they are the future.

The Seder will continue to progress as the next generation of our family steps into the role of leadership and we slowly cede our positions leadership and authority, hopefully becoming Elders with positions of respect and wisdom. This is the natural progression of things. For each of us must embrace our understanding of the Jewish experience not only as a communal experience but as something uniquely our own. This was the tradition will be a meaningful part of our identity combining ritual with relevance.

At the Seder table, we can each look to either side (figuratively or literally), seeing our parents and what they have bequeathed to us and seeing our children as they fashion and shape Judaism as their own. This is the blessing of our legacy; family and historic community forming an unbroken chain linking us all together.

Wishing everyone a Joyful Pesach. Chag Pesach Sameach! and Shabbat Shalom

WE gotta start hearing one another

Ki Tisa is so timely coming in the wake of the Parkland tragedy. The giving of the Law, the singular seminal moment in the Jewish people’s experience, is juxtaposed against the story of the Golden Calf and revolt, the nadir of the Jewish experience. In the immediate aftermath of Parkland, our conversation has devolved into diatribe and intransigence. Seventeen dead barely buried and already we hear polarizing voices condemning and chastising those who do not share the same viewpoint.

Everyone has an idea about how to approach the problem that we have in America. And everyone has an opinion on what the problem is. And sadly, no one is willing to listen to anyone else, particularly when it comes from “the other side.” Whether you think the idea is good or bad, President Trump’s suggestion to arm trained teachers to carry concealed weapons into the schools should be part of the conversation. But the left would rather attack the idea and vilify the person rather than consider the merits of the argument as part of a broader conversation. The NRA would rather demonize those who do not embrace its views instigating people attending the CPAC conference to entrench against the subversive left instead of becoming part of a national discourse.

We need to create a safer more secure society and work towards solutions that address violence. There is no single fix, there is not even a single problem. The issues are deep and multi-layered. I suggest two things to start:

First, we charge the CDC with doing a deep and full study of gun violence in America. All comprehensive analysis has been thwarted by the Dickey amendment since the CDC’s last investigation in 1993. We need to have an intelligent conversation about gun violence and that starts with knowledge.

Second, we need to listen more and talk less. Everyone needs to try to appreciate the position of the other side. You may believe that a gun has absolutely no place in our society at all. There are those who are diametrically opposed to that viewpoint. Both sides have something important to contribute to the national conversation. Until we can stop characterizing the other as “enemy” there is no room for constructive discussion.

Reach out to your congressman and senator to demand the CDC does the important investigative work to provide insight and analysis. Then as a nation, we can move toward finding solutions to the problems we all face. There are solutions to the problem that can make for a better and healthier society. We must find them together.

Do we Deserve our Kids?

Our tradition speaks at great lengths about filial obligations, the responsibilities of children to honor and revere their parents. Likewise, much is written about our obligations as parents to raise children properly, to teach them, and to prepare them for the world. But do we teach them Torah when we do not live it our selves? We do not teach them to build a better world but instead how to selfishly survive in it.

We offer them a world based on material gain, our nation withdrawing from its predominant place in the world, communal strife, a political system challenging the legitimacy of its fundamental institutions, and an economy that will burden them with almost intolerable crushing debt. We have not built a better world for them. And yet, these young people have galvanized in the wake of the Parkland horror. And that gives me hope. For even though we have not done right by them, they seek changes that will benefit us all.

Do we deserve our kids? That remains an open question until we begin to act as though they truly are the most prized things in our lives. We can start by supporting them in their efforts to address gun violence, this grievous wrong in our society that has murdered so many of them. Support them as they raise their voices, join them as they march in March. Help make the world they inherit better than what we have now.

Have a good day! (and please come home alive)

How many parents send their children off to school with this blessing?

The level of violence in our society is incomprehensible. It happens on so many levels but the most blatant manifestation is the tens of thousands of people who are murdered with guns. Seventeen children and teachers are the most recent victims, murdered in their school.

There is no single solution to the problem, but that cannot keep us from working hard to reduce violence and death. Mental Health issues may be at the heart of much of this, but there is an entire category called crimes of passion wherein people resort to guns when the rage is uncontrolled. But the mass murders of innocents such as children and teachers in school can only happen in a society that is content with permitting it. We cannot be complicit any longer.

We are responsible. We do not invest in adequate security for our schools, we do not invest in mental health professionals to help troubled people, we do not invest in systems to keep lethal weapons restricted, we do not ban weapons of mass destruction such as assault rifles.

We can blame feckless and craven Congressmen and State House representatives for inaction, but the ultimate responsibility is ours. If we do not demand action and accountability, these elected representatives devolve into pawns and lackeys. They will neglect the duties of their offices and work only to retain their offices by kowtowing to those with a particular political agenda and money to promote it.

Today we are reeling yet again at the tragedy in a Florida High School. But when we are finished burying the dead, we must galvanize the people to demand thoughtful action to address our horrific problem. There are important organizations advocating ways to reduce gun violence. Join them in their life-saving work.

Jethro, Ideal Father-in-Law and a man for our times

Jan_van_Bronchorst_-_Jethro_advising_Moses

Last week we read Parshat Yitro. It is filled with extraordinary things particularly the story of the title character Yitro and his interaction with Moses and the Children of Israel.

Yitro joins up with the people of the Exodus in support of their leader, his son-in-law Moses, if not in support of their journey to the Promised Land. I am taken by Jethro’s selflessness and righteousness. For Jethro isn’t just any father-in-law, he is a priest of the Midianites. Arguably, his allegiance should be with his people, but Jethro never misunderstands that to mean he should undermine Moses.

It would be easy for Jethro to take advantage of the turmoil in B’nei Israel and steer them towards Midian, immigrants likely ready to offer their experience as slave labor in exchange for food, shelter, and security. Instead, he helps Moses organize a system that brings justice and order to the chaos, strengthening the fledgling institutions under Moses. Jethro remains in the background and not proselytizing, although he was likely a far better communicator than Moses. Finally, once Jethro shared all that he could teach Moses, he departed so that the leadership of Moses would not be challenged if people saw the power behind the power.

Jethro did not abuse his power. Indeed, he deftly manipulated his power into support of Moses. As a Midianite Priest, his worldviews and religion were different from the Children of Israel. However, he was respectful of the “other” and helped them flourish on their particular journey.

We can be different. My beliefs do not require a negation of your beliefs. We can co-exist, cooperate and even consider ourselves connected as part of a larger family. Not only a model father-in-law, Jethro is the model leader for civil pluralistic society for today as well.

The legacy of the Exodus

We are in the midst of that transformational epic Jewish creation myth known as the Exodus. This is the beginning of the discussion of our core identity a God who has freed us from bondage so that we may serve. There is an inherent tension in this idea freedom and service juxtaposed. But also at play is our meaning relative to this Eternal One. When do we actually count? Are we only meaningful in a corporate existence in the arc of history, or do individuals matter?

The narrative begs the question by leading with being remembered after 210 years sojourning in Egypt. Then God remembers and 600thousand with their families are lead out. We cross into the wilderness and begin a two-week trek to the Promised Land that takes 40 years, a deliberate amount of time so that the entire generation that was freed will not survive to reach their goal. What about those poor souls who suffered during 210 years of deteriorating conditions in Egypt? What about those poor souls who would have found satisfaction with enough food to eat and water to drink and would have returned to bondage just for those basic needs? There are many who did not make it along the way. What about them?

For so many of us, living in this new Promised Land came at the expense of untold millions who suffered harsh lives and died ignominious deaths at human hands that practiced hate. How do we remember them properly, with respect and the knowledge that were it not for them, we would not be here. Can we simply say “there but for the grace of God Go I” that we are merely the lucky ones? Aren’t we compelled to practice an active gratitude acknowledging and cherishing those who have come before to make our lives possible and using our blessings and positions to help those who continue to struggle, who have not experienced full redemption? Our tradition suggests that it is our responsibility, not God’s.

When we say goodbye to someone we grieve the loss as we should. The tradition says Zichrono Livracha- May their memory be a blessing. Our task is to fulfill this aspiration and continue to journey.

Shabbat Shalom and Happy New Year

This Shabbat we read Parsha Vayechi, closing the Book of Genesis. This coincides with the end of the secular year 2017. The religious and secular realms share something else as well; we immediately move forward into the Book of Exodus and seamlessly, 2018 starts.

Exodus’s incredible story awaits its unfolding. And if only based on the events of the past year, we anticipate 2018 will be filled with things that will both challenge us and have a far-ranging impact upon us. How we respond will also have a great effect on the future as well.

We end Genesis, as with every book of Torah, with the traditional closing: “Hazak, Hazak, v’nitchazek! Be strong and together we shall be strengthened!”

May we live 2018 energized with the courage of our convictions and move forward together. May 2018 be a year of blessings for us all, in which we work toward creating a legacy worthy of the next generation.

Shabbat Shalom and Happy New Year!

To a wonderful 2018

Hard to get where you are going if you don’t know where you are

And you cant know where you are if you don’t know where you’ve been.

As aphorisms go, mine needs some work, but I hope you get the gist of it. We are ourselves links in a chain and our life journey is similar. The things we learn along the way shape us. Knowing our past helps us understand our present; who we are and how we connect with others. And that helps us take the next steps on our journey.

Our Legacy is not merely an Ethical Will we leave behind, it is the product of our life experiences. Let’s spend some time during 2018 embracing this idea and using it to understand how better to connect and create more meaningful relationships.

A year-end message from Rabbi David Levin

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Todah M’rosh,

Rabbi David