Feeling Conspicuous
Wandering the streets of old Zurich, I felt conspicuous. As usual, I wore my Ukrainian Sunflower Kippah, which usually draws attention. But somehow, this time felt different. The medieval alleys and streets were charming; gassen and the strassen wound around, up and down hilly terrain. The cobblestones beneath our feet, the old-style buildings, and the lake uniquely charm Zurich. And I was generally comfortable in my surroundings. But I wondered if people were looking at the Kippah or the Jew.
Switzerland was neutral during the war, of course. They tend to be neutral on most things except for commerce, where they have a very pro-business attitude. Zurich was not a city that experienced Nazi occupation or Jewish deportations. But the streets seemed strangely empty of Jews.
In a meeting with the liberal Rabbi of Zurich, he shared that it is a small Jewish community that gets along well. The more orthodox denominations do not mix with the more liberal ones, and several synagogues exist. Knowing this did not assuage my feelings as we wandered around a portion of the city where I was the identifiable Jew. The rabbi wore the only other kippah I saw.
I have walked the streets of many cities in many countries, clearly identifying myself by my kippah, so I am unsure why this experience seemed heightened. Perhaps the challenges in Israel, wherein orthodox political parties have pushed to define who is a Jew, have created a particular kind of angst.
In the United States, my kippah is a conversation starter. People often comment on my kippah, on the streets, or even at the orchestra. I use this kippah hoping to discuss supporting Ukraine war victims. I only received furtive glances here, except for the man at passport control. As I was leaving, he cheerfully commented on the kippah’s unique nature, giving me the opportunity to talk about Ukraine.
There is a saying that just because I am paranoid doesn’t make me wrong. But for now, I will chalk it up to my paranoia and continue to publicly and proudly identify who I am.
